I spent the whole day at home, not just because i can or just because i have nothing else to do, but because i wanted to get quite a few things done – mostly ministry related things. But being alone the whole time for me, a Sang-Phleg, was tiring yet therapeutic.
Tiring because i became increasingly restless even though i was doing so many things at the same time – At one point i was doing up the present for my super friend, watching tv, browsing facebook on my laptop and munching on some fruits. Looking back, im pretty impressed that i could do all that at the same time. But all the same i was restless. It was therapeutic only because it was simply a time for me to nuah. And believe me when i say that i really love nuah-ing..
But besides being restless and nuah, being alone really brought out my melancholy. My mind wandered while i wandered across facebook checking out the accounts of my friends from army, secondary school and even primary school. And as i saw how much they kept in contact with their old classmates and how many outings they went out together as a group, i grew a little jealous and sentimental. And alone.
I realised that i never really made good friends from either the schools or army. I never really understood why i didn make an effort to make quality friendships. I guess somehow we never did ‘click’ well enough for quality friendships to be forged. Yes i regret it. And yes the feeling sucks.
The sucky feeling really hit hard once it was night, nearing 10pm. That was where i couldn take it anymore and i told myself i needed to go out of home and just spend some time praying. I decided to take a run first then walk the park and pray. And that was when God moved.
Nope God didn move while i was praying in the park. He didn move while i was running. He didn move while i was walking to the park or warming up. God moved immediately right after i made the decision to go run and pray, before i could even begin to do anything. God moved in the form of a phone call from my brother (Real, blood brother) asking me if i wanna join the rest of the brothers (Not real brothers) for supper at DC’s place. It was very surprising, but it brought such a warm feeling to my heart. God reminded me that i was not alone. That i still had this close group of friends.
As we lazed at the jetty at the reservoir near DC’s place, i realised that its such quality, Godly friendships that really matters at the end of the day. These are friendships that i can most certainly say is lifelong only because we all have 1 common belief – that is that we serve the one and only true God. Though i still yearn to gain back all the lost social circles, im thankful and contented that God has blessed me with such good friends that i can always count on. That is when the sucky feeling left while a warm, secure, feeling took over.
God will make all things good for those who love Him. He took my worries and turned it to joy.
God, you win! You make all things so good, its Beautiful.
